


Ashes, Ashes, We All Fall Down

by stencilSparkler



Category: Avengers: Infinity War - Fandom, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-15
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2019-05-07 07:18:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14666100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stencilSparkler/pseuds/stencilSparkler
Summary: Peter's perspective of That One scene at the end of Avengers: Infinity War.Heavy spoilers for the ending of the movie.





	Ashes, Ashes, We All Fall Down

Sometimes, Peter really hated his spidey sense. 

It was useful, there was no doubt about it. His sixth sense to danger had saved his life more times than he could count, and had helped him save countless more lives in return.  
The problem was that it never really said exactly what the problem was going to be, just that Something was Wrong and it needed to be Fixed. Whether fixing it meant running away or removing the problem by slinging webs around and kicking some ass, that was up to Peter. 

“Something’s happening”. 

The girl with the antennae (Praying Mantis or something, he had been too scared of the alien laying eggs in his chest to really remember), she’d gazed into the distance, fearful of some knowledge only she could see, before she faded away into ashes in the other Peter’s arm.

They all started fading away in the blink of an eye. The muscled man who looks like Vin Diesel, the other Peter, Doctor Strange… and yet all Peter felt was a vague sense of confusion and horror. Whatever transpired after Thanos had left, something was wrong. Would Ned be okay? Would Aunt May be okay? Was Mr. Stark going to crumble into dust too? 

Peter is ripped out of his thoughts by a cold wash of unrelenting, overwhelming _terror_. He almost brushes it off as a panic attack, they had just fought the most powerful being in the universe after all, but- no. This is different, every instinct in him is screaming to get away, fight back, something’s going to happen to him _do something-_

“Mr. Stark?”

Mr. Stark turns to look at him, seems to be just as confused and scared as he does. Good, he thinks, he’s not the only one freaking out about this, Mr. Stark is in charge he’ll know what to do-

He starts feeling a strange sensation in his chest. He doesn’t know how to describe it, exactly; his lungs are crackling with every single one of his panic-induced breaths, his body is stinging in certain areas and numb in others, and he’s pretty sure it’s not just from being thrown against boulders over and over again.

“I don’t feel so good.”

His voice is shaking as he finishes the sentence, and Mr. Stark is looking at him with unguarded horror now. No, this wasn’t right, Mr. Stark was supposed to make a wise crack, he’s supposed to laugh at him and hide his fear with twelve layers of irony and sarcasm and witty one-liners, _he’s not supposed to be looking at me like that do something-_

“You’re alright”.

Peter can’t tell who Mr. Stark is trying to convince with that.

The weird sensation has moved to his limbs, tearing apart and burning and crumbling and his accelerated healing making a vain attempt to sew his body back together. Peter holds his hands in front of his body, his limbs shaking with pain and numbness and _terror oh God one of his fingers is gone-_

“I don’t- I don’t know what’s happening I don’t-“ 

He lets out a grunt as his legs give out and suddenly he’s clinging to Mr. Stark, as though he’s the only thing keeping him tethered to this plane of existence. And Peter comes to the realization that he’s been trying to deny this entire time, that he’s _dying_ ; his optimism has always worked for him before, why wouldn’t it work now? He always figured that if he died in the line of duty, it would be from something awesome, like an alien invasion attacking Queens, or something stupid, like trying to take on said aliens all by himself so no one else has to get hurt. 

_I don’t wanna go I don’t wanna go. Sir please, please I don’t wanna go I don’ **t wanna go why can’t I feel my legs anymore-**_

He can’t hold himself up anymore, he collapses into the dirt and Mr. Stark is there and he’s not fading into dust and he’s still holding on, like if Peter clings to Mr. Stark hard enough he’ll stop crumbling away.

It’s a small piece of comfort as Peter tries to push past his brain screaming in terror, his body trying to delay the inevitable.

His mouth tastes like ash. He’s smart enough to know that it’s not just his teammates ashes anymore.

He’s so scared, everything feels numb and hurts and he can’t bring himself to look at Tony at first.

“I’m sorry”, he manages to choke out. He’s not entirely sure what he’s apologizing for; he’s always been known for apologizing too much (Mr. Stark had always told him to shut up and stop apologizing already, and God what he wouldn’t give to have a normal interaction like that right now).

Maybe he’s apologizing for not getting the gauntlet off fast enough. Maybe it’s because he should have listened to Mr. Stark and gone back to New York, or should have just stayed on the bus and not gotten involved in the first place. Maybe it’s just the fact that he’s dying in a planet billions of miles away from Earth and there’s absolutely nothing he can do about it. 

He’s apologizing to Ned and Aunt May too; Ned caused a distraction for him to get off the bus, and that would be the last time he ever saw Peter. Aunt May knew he was going on a field trip today, and now he’s never going to come home.

And he wants to keep crying and screaming because it’s all happening too fast and too slowly at the same time and Mr. Stark is looking at him with terror and sadness and despair and Peter can’t bring himself to look at that expression anymore, so he turns his head towards the sky. He just feels numb now anyway.

He wishes he could say his last look at the universe was beautiful, staring up into space at the moon and constellations as his vision turns black and white. But he can’t. His mind just goes blank, filling with static like an old TV. He’s pretty sure his heart isn’t beating anymore; it’s a bit hard to do that when your heart has turned into dust with the rest of your body.

His only comfort is in the fact that the rest of him fades away pretty quickly after that.

**Author's Note:**

> anyway so i knew peter's death was coming because i saw spoilers accidentally but i wasnt expecting it to hurt that much??  
> i thought it was gonna be the usual "hero pushes someone out of the way to save them and ends up crushed by a falling boulder" or something why does my boy have to suffer,,  
> i havent written a fanfic in a while so lemme know what you guys think!! thanks for reading <3


End file.
